You’re a good woman and having a job you love and grandkids must help with missing him.
I have lived in CT all my life and hate the cold and winter. My arthritis hates it and the falls I’ve had on ice always resulted in injuries. I also have SAD so a warm sunny place is my dream. That being said, Florida is not my dream. Too much overdevelopment and crazy right wingers.
Someday I hope to live in northern CA with my adult kids in the same state. For now having this warmer than normal week for my birthday week is a gift I’ll take.
It's your birthday?!?! HAPPY BIRTHDAY (not sorry to shout). SAD and cold is no place to be. I really do get it. I am not a fan of the humid hot. I get mean if I'm where I can't get into shade.
Having said that, northern California just may be one of my favorite places in the country.
My brother left CT for FL in the mid 70's and has lived there since. My sister owned a home there for a couple of years and now our oldest son has resided in Fort Lauderdale since 2017. My wife and I hate Florida as it is over developed to the max, and governed by right wing loons. That being said I love your post today. It hits home on several levels.
Love this essay. I have returned to Michigan after 15 years in CT. I love MI and its natural beauty. My only regret is that I now live in central Michigan where it may as well be desert regarding precipitation. Seems the lake effect snow and rain drench the coasts and dissipate in central state. That big storm we were supposed to get last week? We got the wind and about 1" of snow. What a disappointment. I simply LOVE walking in the snow and if its coming down hard at the same time, I'm in heaven! Its so quiet, it's like a spiritual experience. You can hear the snowflakes fall. Of course, come March and I'm ready to scream. But December, January and February, if we have snow, I'm all in.
Oh! My thoughts exactly. I always make a point of going out for a walk in the snow. It's other-worldly and you get to walk down the middle of the street.
I’ve enjoyed Florida’s natural beauty but the rest of it is way too, what’s the word? Florida. I’ve always thought the whole state should have been made a national park around 1910. I feel the same way about most of the southwest. Way too many people live in environments that can’t support the population. Too much water, too little water. Too vulnerable to storms, floods, droughts, fires. I find it increasingly difficult to have sympathy for those who intentionally move into flood or fire zones. I have no patience for the ones that water the grass in front of their cul-de-sac houses in the middle of the desert, trying to change their environment into something that it’s not.
To me the changing seasons has always been like traveling while staying in place. Each one has its beauty and challenges, revealing things about the earth and ourselves. The other day the post here was about resolutions. I didn’t contribute because that’s something I haven’t done in years but if I had to pick one it would be to always remember to take the time to take a good long look around.
I love that image, that witnessing g the seasons is like traveling while staying put. I’ve spent the last day and a half cleaning — like, really cleaning — my house. It’s something I do to great the new year. I am also making sure the cave is ready for the cold months, should they ever arrive in Connecticut. Furnace serviced? Check. Drafty window repaired? Check.
When I lived in Ontario and Connecticut and Michigan, I liked the cold weather, the snow shoveling when I didn't have to hurry about it, the snowy insulation of the soil from frost heave, the periodic miseries of chill and damp and the radiating warmth of recovering from them.
When I lived in Southern Illinois and now in Colorado, I like the cold days and the world shining after an ice storm and the soft days and the snow shoveling when I don't have to hurry. Southern Illinois was nothing if not wet, and I liked that, but now in dry Colorado, I naturally cherish the precipitation even more.
When I lived in California I enjoyed the very different sequence of seasons in their comparative subtleties, and worried about fire season and about the inability of my fellow-residents to drive safely when the small occasional rains made laminas of months of oil deposited on roads. !I lived in California only for a few years, and never during high-rain periods.)
Right now my husband had spinal surgery (neck) in November and my son is now finally breaking through threshold anxiety about college apps, and while I'm glad to have been, to be able to support them I'm also feeling pretty crowded out of my own life....
I remember feeling like that at times, especially around launch times, when the sons were applying for college and fretting over their futures. I never had the addition of someone recovering from surgery. I think it would be easy -- if you try to be a kind person -- to get lost in that. And then I would remember what someone once said about being on a plane and the attendants telling parents to make sure, in the event of an emergency, that their masks were on securely before they helped their loved ones into their masks. That stuck with me. I'm not giving advice (I am not running my own life well enough to run yours, as well) but that bit of wisdom helped me.
:D I should say that fortunately neither of my young men are very beck-and-call, and that while I'm pretty flexible I do take time for myself.
In addition, when Chun Woo's got his last app in, which now shouldn't take long God be praised, I'm going to have a conversation with him about future self-management as both as advisor and someone he was shitty to. (Waiting so as not to impede momentum.)
Central Florida where I live has pleasant weather, in my view. But I admit, climate change has made summer months hotter and we actually had a few days last week with temps below freezing!
The first time the thermostat dips below 50 the long underwear goes on and it doesn’t usually come off until sometime around Memorial Day
My disdain for cold weather is something I deal with only because I live in a centralized area where I can travel by car to any of the New England capitals in no more 3 and a half hours
Albany and Trenton are also within that time frame and Harrisburg and Dover only an hour longer
I can’t believe that living in Miami it takes more than 6 hours to get to Tallahassee
Can't say I enjoy the cold, and if I had the resources I might do likewise. I grew up in Texas and it took me 20 years to even begin to accept the fact that I had to get a real winter coat and winter boots and winter gloves if I had any notion of going outside. I remember one awful snow storm when it took me over two hours just to get from my place of work to the entrance ramp to the Parkway which was less than half a mile away. I'm retired now and I don't have to drive in the white stuff anymore, and I'm pretty grateful for that. And surviving winter does make me that much more grateful when the first signs of Spring finally arrive.
I admire the resilience of your marriage that you can do this and welcome the experience. It does seem like a happy medium.
I don't know if I precisely welcome it, but I don't kick against it. I married someone I admire and like, beyond all the mushy stuff. Aren't you supposed to want the best for your friends? And once I, too, learned that winter wear means everything here, I got a lot more comfortable.
So clever, and yes, I relate. I've always swung between Colorado and California, a cabin near a lake 15 miles from Telluride and a home near the beach in Santa Monica. Not bad options, but I wish the ocean would hold still for just a moment, like a mountain. There's just one problem with the cabin: my daughter is living there now and on Jan. 1 had to drive 8+ hours to get to a veterinary clinic at CSU Fort Collins for her corgi who needed surgery. As for joined-at-the-hip marriage, no way. Both John and I knew that, 50 years ago.
We looked at North Carolina when we were first talking about retiring, but that wasn't warm enough for one of us. If you can avoid the hurricanes, that seems like a relatively temperate state. I lost that argument, though.
You’re a good woman and having a job you love and grandkids must help with missing him.
I have lived in CT all my life and hate the cold and winter. My arthritis hates it and the falls I’ve had on ice always resulted in injuries. I also have SAD so a warm sunny place is my dream. That being said, Florida is not my dream. Too much overdevelopment and crazy right wingers.
Someday I hope to live in northern CA with my adult kids in the same state. For now having this warmer than normal week for my birthday week is a gift I’ll take.
It's your birthday?!?! HAPPY BIRTHDAY (not sorry to shout). SAD and cold is no place to be. I really do get it. I am not a fan of the humid hot. I get mean if I'm where I can't get into shade.
Having said that, northern California just may be one of my favorite places in the country.
Thanks! I definitely agree. No humidity!
My brother left CT for FL in the mid 70's and has lived there since. My sister owned a home there for a couple of years and now our oldest son has resided in Fort Lauderdale since 2017. My wife and I hate Florida as it is over developed to the max, and governed by right wing loons. That being said I love your post today. It hits home on several levels.
I love you, my friend.
Love this essay. I have returned to Michigan after 15 years in CT. I love MI and its natural beauty. My only regret is that I now live in central Michigan where it may as well be desert regarding precipitation. Seems the lake effect snow and rain drench the coasts and dissipate in central state. That big storm we were supposed to get last week? We got the wind and about 1" of snow. What a disappointment. I simply LOVE walking in the snow and if its coming down hard at the same time, I'm in heaven! Its so quiet, it's like a spiritual experience. You can hear the snowflakes fall. Of course, come March and I'm ready to scream. But December, January and February, if we have snow, I'm all in.
Oh! My thoughts exactly. I always make a point of going out for a walk in the snow. It's other-worldly and you get to walk down the middle of the street.
I’ve enjoyed Florida’s natural beauty but the rest of it is way too, what’s the word? Florida. I’ve always thought the whole state should have been made a national park around 1910. I feel the same way about most of the southwest. Way too many people live in environments that can’t support the population. Too much water, too little water. Too vulnerable to storms, floods, droughts, fires. I find it increasingly difficult to have sympathy for those who intentionally move into flood or fire zones. I have no patience for the ones that water the grass in front of their cul-de-sac houses in the middle of the desert, trying to change their environment into something that it’s not.
To me the changing seasons has always been like traveling while staying in place. Each one has its beauty and challenges, revealing things about the earth and ourselves. The other day the post here was about resolutions. I didn’t contribute because that’s something I haven’t done in years but if I had to pick one it would be to always remember to take the time to take a good long look around.
I love that image, that witnessing g the seasons is like traveling while staying put. I’ve spent the last day and a half cleaning — like, really cleaning — my house. It’s something I do to great the new year. I am also making sure the cave is ready for the cold months, should they ever arrive in Connecticut. Furnace serviced? Check. Drafty window repaired? Check.
When I lived in Ontario and Connecticut and Michigan, I liked the cold weather, the snow shoveling when I didn't have to hurry about it, the snowy insulation of the soil from frost heave, the periodic miseries of chill and damp and the radiating warmth of recovering from them.
When I lived in Southern Illinois and now in Colorado, I like the cold days and the world shining after an ice storm and the soft days and the snow shoveling when I don't have to hurry. Southern Illinois was nothing if not wet, and I liked that, but now in dry Colorado, I naturally cherish the precipitation even more.
When I lived in California I enjoyed the very different sequence of seasons in their comparative subtleties, and worried about fire season and about the inability of my fellow-residents to drive safely when the small occasional rains made laminas of months of oil deposited on roads. !I lived in California only for a few years, and never during high-rain periods.)
Right now my husband had spinal surgery (neck) in November and my son is now finally breaking through threshold anxiety about college apps, and while I'm glad to have been, to be able to support them I'm also feeling pretty crowded out of my own life....
I remember feeling like that at times, especially around launch times, when the sons were applying for college and fretting over their futures. I never had the addition of someone recovering from surgery. I think it would be easy -- if you try to be a kind person -- to get lost in that. And then I would remember what someone once said about being on a plane and the attendants telling parents to make sure, in the event of an emergency, that their masks were on securely before they helped their loved ones into their masks. That stuck with me. I'm not giving advice (I am not running my own life well enough to run yours, as well) but that bit of wisdom helped me.
:D I should say that fortunately neither of my young men are very beck-and-call, and that while I'm pretty flexible I do take time for myself.
In addition, when Chun Woo's got his last app in, which now shouldn't take long God be praised, I'm going to have a conversation with him about future self-management as both as advisor and someone he was shitty to. (Waiting so as not to impede momentum.)
Yep. I had those conversations, too. And I also waited until a much-discussed/avoided task was complete. Mostly, I waited.
Happy 2023 everyone!
Central Florida where I live has pleasant weather, in my view. But I admit, climate change has made summer months hotter and we actually had a few days last week with temps below freezing!
So eventually, our bad actions will bring seasons to Florida. That’s pretty weird.
Yup.
:-(
I’m not a fan of cold weather either
The first time the thermostat dips below 50 the long underwear goes on and it doesn’t usually come off until sometime around Memorial Day
My disdain for cold weather is something I deal with only because I live in a centralized area where I can travel by car to any of the New England capitals in no more 3 and a half hours
Albany and Trenton are also within that time frame and Harrisburg and Dover only an hour longer
I can’t believe that living in Miami it takes more than 6 hours to get to Tallahassee
It’s a giant state. You think, “Oh, Sanibel! Let’s drive!” And you’re in the car four hours, one way.
One season world is not my fave 😶
I like to earn my happy times.
Can't say I enjoy the cold, and if I had the resources I might do likewise. I grew up in Texas and it took me 20 years to even begin to accept the fact that I had to get a real winter coat and winter boots and winter gloves if I had any notion of going outside. I remember one awful snow storm when it took me over two hours just to get from my place of work to the entrance ramp to the Parkway which was less than half a mile away. I'm retired now and I don't have to drive in the white stuff anymore, and I'm pretty grateful for that. And surviving winter does make me that much more grateful when the first signs of Spring finally arrive.
I admire the resilience of your marriage that you can do this and welcome the experience. It does seem like a happy medium.
I don't know if I precisely welcome it, but I don't kick against it. I married someone I admire and like, beyond all the mushy stuff. Aren't you supposed to want the best for your friends? And once I, too, learned that winter wear means everything here, I got a lot more comfortable.
So clever, and yes, I relate. I've always swung between Colorado and California, a cabin near a lake 15 miles from Telluride and a home near the beach in Santa Monica. Not bad options, but I wish the ocean would hold still for just a moment, like a mountain. There's just one problem with the cabin: my daughter is living there now and on Jan. 1 had to drive 8+ hours to get to a veterinary clinic at CSU Fort Collins for her corgi who needed surgery. As for joined-at-the-hip marriage, no way. Both John and I knew that, 50 years ago.
We looked at North Carolina when we were first talking about retiring, but that wasn't warm enough for one of us. If you can avoid the hurricanes, that seems like a relatively temperate state. I lost that argument, though.