The HUGE difference between you and the trolls who gutlessly throw anonymous insults at you (ad hominem fallacy, anyone?) is that you constantly self-reflect. Those others? They lack either the ability or the interest (or both) in such honest thinking.
I grew up in Texas in the 50s and 60s. The only Black people I ever had contact with were either maids or yard-workers employed by my more well-off relatives. Racism was in the air I breathed.
It's taken me a lifetime to realize and admit to myself just how much prejudice I harbor. Being aware is half the battle.
I was badly brought up by parents who were relatively unbiased at the time, compared with our demographics, and who were badly brought up by fine people doing their best, who were considerably more racist. (That's the extent of my personal knowledge: I don't think you can say much about the upbringing of people you never knew, unless they wrote about it and you read it.) I am trying to have my son less badly brought up than I was.
So far as I know that trajectory is the best I can do. And I'll do it as hard as I can, not resting myself in trying to bring myself up better, which is part of the upbringing I give my son.
You’re courageous to keep putting your thoughts about there, Susan, and I for one am grateful that you do. How else are we all going to grow if we’re too afraid to speak, mistep, reveal ourselves? I was reading Fr. Richard Rohr today about how our false selves (the part of us that is not connected to God) falls away as we grow. Keep writing. Bible and science, indeed! ❤️
Lots to process here. For those of us with Hartford roots we saw how the city was split into sections by ethnicity and wealth. I don’t think Hartford ever recovered from its dark past which is maybe why it has the dubious distinction of being the poorest Capitol city in the nation?!?
I think that's exactly what happened. I tell journalism students that nothing just happens. The separation by ethnicity and income was deliberate and ugly.
My question asks what does "flat out" imply? I feel that this categorically reductive phrase gives too much relevance to the word "racism" being an intrinsic mode of human being-ness. In my mind, we tend to think of racism as a type, when it might be simply a mental token of the overall mood of our country at any given moment that folks pick up on.
In a hospital in Orlando lays my husband's best friend dying of cancer. He's an Alabama guy, a football star under Bill Bryant, who was fond of his "token Jew!" One night he begged forgiveness for his racists joked and outward look of a committed racists, G-d forbid we told anyone. Was his repented self authentic, who knows. We love this cowboy to death. So asking us if we are all some degree or ",flat out" racists, to me, an overthinking soul, is a loaded question, lol!.
There’s the “intent” vs. “impact” discussion. It’s sort of along the lines of what Art said about people’s actions. Actually, it’s not an “either” vs. “or” discussion. On a good day I consider what my intent is before I say or do something. Then I consider how what I’m about to say or do will impact the person or people it’s directed at. As a friend, I get your choice of the word smell as part a descriptive phrase about a type of person; a phrase you put in quotation marks. It gave me no doubts about your good heart or intentions. If I was your editor, I probably would have pointed out that using that specific word would leave an opening for someone to do exactly what the tweeter did. They not only ignored your quotation marks, they used their own to attribute not only the statement but the feeling to you personally. It’s no different than editing a video or audio clip to turn someone’s argument against them. The tweeter may be too clever by half and for all we know a right wing racist but the “impact” was that they saw an opportunity and took it. In their case, I suspect their intent was to achieve exactly the impact they achieved. More and more it’s become the nature of what passes for debate these days. There’s no being airtight enough if someone is going to misconstrue our words and use them against us.
As for the other stuff, I’ll give my parents credit for doing a pretty good job of raising me regarding people different from us but I couldn’t help but grow up with biases. I think the trick is to be conscious of them, know that they’re a constant companion. Just don’t make them your friend.
These days my most negative bias is toward old white guys and I’m an old white guy. If i was a professional writer imagine what somebody would do with that statement.
I am no stranger to sending words out and then watching them be reinterpreted in ways I never I tended. Some of that is, as you said, my leaving myself open (and not always on purpose). Years ago, a woman called after I’d written a weird piece about, well, death, I guess was my point. She saw deeper things in there than I ever intended, which was cool.
We can all learn more about our own racism (yes we all do have some at some level) by taking the free online quiz about unconscious bias. I did it as part of a seminar by Community Foundation for Greater New Haven and highly recommend it. Eye opening to say the least. The quiz was developed (if memory serves & it may not) by Harvard.
Regarding the Bible verse related to a thought being the same as an act: I wonder if the word "intent" needs more attention. While there could be a reflex (not good) thought based on past observed words and behaviors, the conscious mind might pause, self-reflect and determine that the initial thought is no longer representative of the person wishes to intend. There is opportunity to do better. That process of intending to do better and working on it (what you do) seems much different from thinking a bad thought and not disputing it. Working on losing the judgment of others based on their differences can be difficult. I'm constantly working on it. When it comes to systemic racism (and other -isms), it is so very frustrating when people won't acknowledge it and do better. We need most of us to agree to work on it to truly progress. It's so frustrating.
The HUGE difference between you and the trolls who gutlessly throw anonymous insults at you (ad hominem fallacy, anyone?) is that you constantly self-reflect. Those others? They lack either the ability or the interest (or both) in such honest thinking.
Isn't that what separates the children from the adults? Aren't we supposed to be always questioning?
Exactly.
I grew up in Texas in the 50s and 60s. The only Black people I ever had contact with were either maids or yard-workers employed by my more well-off relatives. Racism was in the air I breathed.
It's taken me a lifetime to realize and admit to myself just how much prejudice I harbor. Being aware is half the battle.
I hope so.
I am not so concerned whether or not someone is a racist as I am about do they “act” like a racist.
I guess that's the thing, isn't it? We can think what we want, but our actions affect others.
On Twitter I've had people tell me I have a low I.Q. Usually it's anti-vaxxers who struggle with punctuation, spelling, capitalization, and syntax.
If I get called stupid, I brush it off. If I get called a bitch, well, it depends on your definition of bitch but that's probably accurate so cool.
I have a black friend that I first came to know at a Ramones show
It turned out that he was friends with Johnny Ramone
They were both big autograph collectors and that’s how they got to know each other
About 5 years after I first met Steve I started working with him
I had to ask him about his relationship with Johnny Ramone
It was long rumored that Johnny was a bit of a racist
Steve told me that Johnny was always good to him and he never heard him say anything that he considered racist
But he also said that he doesn’t doubt that the rumors about Johnny being a racist are true
I guess when your own band mate writes a song about you being in the KKK it’s kind of a given that you might harbor racist feelings
Pretty good indictator, I’d say.
'zactly.
I was badly brought up by parents who were relatively unbiased at the time, compared with our demographics, and who were badly brought up by fine people doing their best, who were considerably more racist. (That's the extent of my personal knowledge: I don't think you can say much about the upbringing of people you never knew, unless they wrote about it and you read it.) I am trying to have my son less badly brought up than I was.
So far as I know that trajectory is the best I can do. And I'll do it as hard as I can, not resting myself in trying to bring myself up better, which is part of the upbringing I give my son.
I love THAT, too: I am trying to bring up my son less badly than I was brought up. That's my goal, as well.
You’re courageous to keep putting your thoughts about there, Susan, and I for one am grateful that you do. How else are we all going to grow if we’re too afraid to speak, mistep, reveal ourselves? I was reading Fr. Richard Rohr today about how our false selves (the part of us that is not connected to God) falls away as we grow. Keep writing. Bible and science, indeed! ❤️
I love that notion, the false parts of us fall away. Good. I don't need that part, anyway.
Me either!
Lots to process here. For those of us with Hartford roots we saw how the city was split into sections by ethnicity and wealth. I don’t think Hartford ever recovered from its dark past which is maybe why it has the dubious distinction of being the poorest Capitol city in the nation?!?
I think that's exactly what happened. I tell journalism students that nothing just happens. The separation by ethnicity and income was deliberate and ugly.
My question asks what does "flat out" imply? I feel that this categorically reductive phrase gives too much relevance to the word "racism" being an intrinsic mode of human being-ness. In my mind, we tend to think of racism as a type, when it might be simply a mental token of the overall mood of our country at any given moment that folks pick up on.
In a hospital in Orlando lays my husband's best friend dying of cancer. He's an Alabama guy, a football star under Bill Bryant, who was fond of his "token Jew!" One night he begged forgiveness for his racists joked and outward look of a committed racists, G-d forbid we told anyone. Was his repented self authentic, who knows. We love this cowboy to death. So asking us if we are all some degree or ",flat out" racists, to me, an overthinking soul, is a loaded question, lol!.
Indeed… folk got to wake up to who they are, I don’t gotta wake up with em.
There’s the “intent” vs. “impact” discussion. It’s sort of along the lines of what Art said about people’s actions. Actually, it’s not an “either” vs. “or” discussion. On a good day I consider what my intent is before I say or do something. Then I consider how what I’m about to say or do will impact the person or people it’s directed at. As a friend, I get your choice of the word smell as part a descriptive phrase about a type of person; a phrase you put in quotation marks. It gave me no doubts about your good heart or intentions. If I was your editor, I probably would have pointed out that using that specific word would leave an opening for someone to do exactly what the tweeter did. They not only ignored your quotation marks, they used their own to attribute not only the statement but the feeling to you personally. It’s no different than editing a video or audio clip to turn someone’s argument against them. The tweeter may be too clever by half and for all we know a right wing racist but the “impact” was that they saw an opportunity and took it. In their case, I suspect their intent was to achieve exactly the impact they achieved. More and more it’s become the nature of what passes for debate these days. There’s no being airtight enough if someone is going to misconstrue our words and use them against us.
As for the other stuff, I’ll give my parents credit for doing a pretty good job of raising me regarding people different from us but I couldn’t help but grow up with biases. I think the trick is to be conscious of them, know that they’re a constant companion. Just don’t make them your friend.
These days my most negative bias is toward old white guys and I’m an old white guy. If i was a professional writer imagine what somebody would do with that statement.
I am no stranger to sending words out and then watching them be reinterpreted in ways I never I tended. Some of that is, as you said, my leaving myself open (and not always on purpose). Years ago, a woman called after I’d written a weird piece about, well, death, I guess was my point. She saw deeper things in there than I ever intended, which was cool.
We can all learn more about our own racism (yes we all do have some at some level) by taking the free online quiz about unconscious bias. I did it as part of a seminar by Community Foundation for Greater New Haven and highly recommend it. Eye opening to say the least. The quiz was developed (if memory serves & it may not) by Harvard.
It was. I’ve given it in class though not for a while now.
Regarding the Bible verse related to a thought being the same as an act: I wonder if the word "intent" needs more attention. While there could be a reflex (not good) thought based on past observed words and behaviors, the conscious mind might pause, self-reflect and determine that the initial thought is no longer representative of the person wishes to intend. There is opportunity to do better. That process of intending to do better and working on it (what you do) seems much different from thinking a bad thought and not disputing it. Working on losing the judgment of others based on their differences can be difficult. I'm constantly working on it. When it comes to systemic racism (and other -isms), it is so very frustrating when people won't acknowledge it and do better. We need most of us to agree to work on it to truly progress. It's so frustrating.