A trip down Devil's Lane

A reader writes:

Readers like to send things to me in big, puffy envelopes. I believe their intentions are (mostly) good, because many of the fatter envelopes that come include content meant to save my soul.

That’s cool. I’d like to save my soul, too, and this week, what came in the mail was one of those Chick Publications tracts I once handed out as a kid — though this one, which explores the Satanic holiday of Halloween, is a new one to me. (Yet I, for one, am thrilled to find that Chick has 11 different publications under the heading “End Time Prophecies.”)

I have to say these weren’t terrifically popular among some of us fundamentalists from that age, mostly because all you had to do was open one of the little nasty-grams and see that each message was coated in FEAR! and DAMNATION! and come ON, a generation weaning itself on “The Brady Bunch” was going to look at this and laugh.

I know I did, but I read every one of them, and then would cheerfully decline to hand them out when I knocked doors for Jesus. I figured the Bible was sufficiently scary.

Here are some latter day entries:

Global Warming: Many claim excessive heat buildup will destroy the earth. They're right, but it's not coming the way they expect.

and

Who’s missing? When the rapture hits — millions will be missing. Will you be one of them or will you be left behind?

Honest to God, there’s a part of me that appreciates that someone has stayed pissed this long. I was so excited to share with my colleagues — none of whom were raised fundamentalist — how thrilled I was to get one of these. And then I saw the looks on their faces, and decided to quietly go back to my office and pin this to the wall. I was reminded — once again — that a freak flag is interesting only so long as it’s observed from a distance and over a hill. That’s mostly because filling someone in on the backstory would take too, too long.